|
Friday, August 31, 2012 How is it possible that I can feel so blessed yet melancholic at the same time?It's day 15 aimlessly clicking and tapping around electronic devices, with absolutely no direction. There's more than a hundred more to go
Thursday, August 30, 2012 I know this feeling oh-so, this feeling in my bonesI'd say I'm much better than before and than many others, but I guess I'll never get used to being alone. I know, the closest ones question me. They don't believe it. I was never meant to be solitary. How could I be? I can't wait forever, neither can you What do I do when trance starts to fail as company? Dig a hole and hide and scream?
Sunday, August 26, 2012 Sometimes I wonder if my paranoia warrants psychiatric intervention.Quite sure it does. Just praying for it not to consume me
Monday, August 20, 2012 Time feeling like I'm on weed, not that I'd knowI'd have been hanging on for 2 years by the time I got to December Fuck me, right?
Friday, August 17, 2012 Look forwardTake one step Take another Never look back; you'll get stuck in that whirlpool of memories Build new ones with every step 122 days You'll make it
Thursday, August 16, 2012 ThrobbingSunken Stoned Piercing Screaming, IT'S FUCKING PAINFUL DO YOU HEAR ME? If this was a movie you'd be here by now Well my life could be a movie, sure as hell
Wednesday, August 15, 2012 Immense pain in the chest;
Splitting headache
A beautiful girl with a beautiful smile
Tuesday, August 14, 2012 I know why I'm here. Tonight I want to pray.I felt violent turbulence, havoc, injustice not long ago. But tonight I am calm. I cannot say that I am ready, but I know I'll make it through. Because I have faith, and because I always have. I have given up trying to catch and keep time. Live in the moment, we said, close your eyes, feel, and think about nothing. It will all come back to you eventually. Heavy boots
Thursday, August 02, 2012 Money can't buy you happiness, they said, at least up to a certain point, they said.I never knew I'd find out the truth of that adage at 21 years of age. In the past month I've trotted around London, Paris, Barcelona, Rome, Venice, Milan, Zermatt, Geneva, Berlin, Amsterdam. I've eaten at Joel Robuchon, Osteria alle tieste, Gordon Ramsay. 1, 2, 3 Michelin stars. I've watched 4 sports at the London Olympics 2012, sat in the VIP arena of Wembley, centre court of Wimbeldon, London ExCel, and the Olympic stadium, had dozens of shopping sprees, skied at the most beautiful mountain of the Swiss alps. But what do all these mean? A packet of photographic memories, chained up in soft copy for generations to see. Where is the happiness? Fleeting instances of excitement, honour, overwhelming pride, but no happiness. Can money buy happiness? I can make a million people jealous. That doesn't make me happy. I want to sit at a coffee shop and catch up with friends clad in sleepwear over tauhuay. I want to sit at starbucks and talk to people who mean the most to me. Why am I here? Is it pointless? Do I regret it?
|
escapist but a morose optimist. musings June 2004 July 2004 August 2004 September 2004 October 2004 November 2004 December 2004 January 2005 February 2005 March 2005 April 2005 May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 January 2011 February 2011 March 2011 April 2011 May 2011 June 2011 July 2011 August 2011 September 2011 October 2011 November 2011 December 2011 January 2012 February 2012 March 2012 April 2012 May 2012 June 2012 July 2012 August 2012 September 2012 October 2012 November 2012 December 2012 January 2013 February 2013 April 2013 May 2013 August 2014 March 2017 through solitude 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 and drab at random blogger box
|