Sunday, January 18, 2009
When you see red all around in that mirrorMassive heat and a throbbing head
That's when it works
Successfully killed myself today
And noone's gonna beat that
Sunday, January 11, 2009
This is the last minute scream before the term starts5A's 5A!!!
Thursday, January 08, 2009
For the masochist who doesnt dare to jump off the parapetWait for the darkness
Take that shot
The black one
It wont make you heat inside
Dont swallow
No sugar
Move it along your tongue
Savour that bitterness
Coat your gums in bitterness
Let it slide right through
Now take the double
Take that puff
Engulf your lungs in fragrance
Let it out
Feel the comfort all around
Feel the damage inside
Its not enough
Take another
Look at the scar
Trace it with your knife
Taste it
Feels like a good drink
Tear out the sutures
Taste it
Soak yourself in sea water
Dont scream
Embrace the pain
Swear about your father
Swear about your mother
Repeat all - as many as required
Now you wish you were dead.
Good.
Now you take that plunge. It'll all be over.
Tuesday, January 06, 2009
Good thing I'm not a very superstitious person or else my whole of this year might as well be filled with a whole lot of pain and vomitting and appreciation and 5 A's. Recently I've been seeing unfairness more often, and its creeping up behind me. I think I used to be an optimistic person, or maybe I was born one, but then I was forced to live with the most pessimistic arrogant egoistic person in the world. And this person was kinda influential. So I became increasingly pessimistic sadistic masochistic you name it. And I wasn't even just influenced. It was as good as being brainwashed - to think in a certain way, behave a certain way, live in a certain way. Like some massed produced machine from a production line. I don't think I'm being critical now. It's just the awful truth and like I was told, 'it's just how it is'.
Thursday, January 01, 2009
Get out! I call police!
escapist
but a morose optimist.
musings
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